Speaking of impoverished worldviews:

Indie band The White Stripes formally announced their breakup today. People in 2003 are very upset.

You know, I certainly don’t expect much from the kind of vacuous moron who writes at a site like Gawker. But reducing an artist’s entire identity to that fleeting moment in media consciousness when they achieved a perfect balance between indie credibility, mainstream success and novelty… I mean, it would be one thing if he said, “Ahh, they always sucked ass anyway; who cares.” But it’s so much more depressingly shallow to put it as, “Ahh, anything more than five minutes old is, like, so totally lame-o and not worth paying attention to. I mean, 2003?! Did they even have smartphones back then? Whatevs!”
Did hipsters exist back in Old Testament times? Because if so, the Great Flood suddenly seems eminently rational and defensible.