I was gonna go off on one of my rants here, about the shriveled little bags of hate and resentment in the comments here showing what unique sophisticates they are by complaining that a website reviewed the finale of a very popular and beloved show, despite the fact that they probably sit at said website hitting refresh over and over so that they can momentarily distract themselves from their drab, empty lives of misdirected self-hatred and congealed defensive apathy as they wait for the inevitable moment when they realize that they’ve gone grey and gotten varicose veins and lost the last shreds of their youth without ever once bothering to feel an unguarded emotion, so consumed were they with the fear that some fuckface will make fun of them for actually trying and in so doing cost them a social currency that was absolutely worthless to them in the first place, and sob quietly in the night for having thrown away the only gift life gives us, the gift of being emotional creatures capable of experiencing feelings so intense that they can ruin or save your life, if you only leave your beating human heart open enough to risk the pain that is the price of everything and anything truly worth experiencing.

Some friends and I once had a fun contest to see who could write the best one-sentence horror story. My blue-ribbon submission, a story about a transvestite prostitute serial killer who favored a pizza cutter as a murder weapon, told from the perspective of the john/victim, seems weak in comparison to this.