Nothing can contribute more to peace of soul than the lack of any opinion whatever.

— Georg Christoph Lichtenberg, The Waste Books

To the untrained eye, it may seem that I’m a lazy bastard who fails to uphold the implicit bargain I’ve made to provide you fellows with some light entertainment on a semi-regular basis. Nothing could be further from the truth. In fact, what you’ve been seeing is an avant-garde exercise in non-posting. The layman thinks, “This guy only posts every couple weeks. What a bum!” No doubt, he also thinks that his kindergartener could create a masterpiece of abstract expressionism. You, though, the blognoscenti, you understand that what appears to be an expanse of empty time, a forgotten password, or perhaps the literal death of the author, is actually an acerbic meta-commentary on the inane discourse of our culture. The philistine sees everyone chattering about a Barbie movie, goes to social media to say, “Why are all these adults so worked up over a two-hour advertisement for Mattel products?” and in so doing, compromises his integrity by participating in the same chatter and seeking the same validation. Here, you see the absence of commentary on blockbuster movies, viral clickbait, and political folly. The silence hangs heavy; reproving; accusatory. The discerning observer sees the same post occupying the top spot for two weeks and says, “Ah, I can imagine Damian’s snort of contempt and disgusted eye-roll when he saw the Current Thing.” It’s like our little inside joke.