Why not just legalize cocaine, then?

Delivered in a black packet emblazoned with a skull and crossbones, the coffee is said to have ’200 per cent’ more caffeine than your standard cuppa. ‘This is not your regular morning coffee.  This is not your store bought coffee.  You will not find this coffee at your local diner or at your sissy Starbucks,’ its disclaimer reads.

Ain’t that America. Anyway, I just wanted to use this opportunity to make you all listen to the Wildhearts: